Beer

Liquid Bread

Bier (German/Dutch), Beoir (Irish), Bière (French), Birra (Italiano/Maltese), Μπύρα (Greek), Bjór (Icelandic), Bere (Romanian), Bira (Turkish), Bia (Vietnamese), Пиво (Russkij/Ukrainian/Serbian), Pivo (Czech/Slovak/Croatian), Piwo (Polish), เบียร์ (Thai), بيرة (Arabic), آبجو (Persian), Գարեջուր (Armenian), Cwrw (Welsh), ビール (Japanese), Cervisia (Latin), Cerveza (Spanish), Cerveja (Portuguese), Serbesa (Filipino), Øl (Danish/Norwegian), Öl (Swedish), Olut (Finnish), and Sör (Hungarian).

 
"Beer[1] for breakfast?" Let he who is among you that hasn't had a six-pack or two before lunchtime cast the first stone (or get stoned first)!

Actually this 'blog-entry is not about breakfast, but just about the liquid gold, fermented beverage. My 'blog, my 'rules, after all. However, it is interesting to note that there are many similar ingredients to bread: water, grains, and yeast.

Beer is the third most popular drink in the World, after water and tea. (Unless your name is Mitt Romney, then it would be just water, 7up®, and ginger ale.) Beer is one of the oldest prepared beverages, possibly dating back as far as the early Neolithic or 9500 BC. There is archeological evidence of it dating to circa 3500-3100 BC. (So, while Beer is not quite as old as the invention of the wheel, I am sure the first DUI was handed out circa 3499-3099 BC.)

Beer is an alcoholic beverage made by brewing and fermenting cereals (especially malted barley, although wheat, corn, and rice can also be used), usually with the addition of hops as a flavouring agent and stabilizer. Beers generally fall into two broad categories: Ales[2] (made with top-fermenting yeast that ferment more quickly at warmer temperatures) and Lagers[3] (made with bottom-fermenting yeast that ferment more slowly at cooler temperatures). In the category of Ales, there are several sub-categories: Pale Ale, Brown Ale, Scotch, Belgian, Porter, and Stout. Lagers have the sub-categories: Pale (to include: Pilsners[4], Helles, Light Beers, and Märzens[5]) and Dark (to include: Dunkels, Schwarzbiers, Bocks, and Doppelbocks).

One of my favourite Beers is Guinness® Original/Extra Stout. This is especially best when served on tap from a keg at a good Irish pub that knows how to properly pour a "Pionta Guinness, le do thoil!" I have even had the pleasure to make a pilgrimage to the original Guinness Brewery in Dublin, Ireland. If you ever visit Dublin, it is well worth the tour.

http://www.guinness.com/

Probably my second favourite (and lesser-known) Beer is Black Sheep Brewery Riggwelter[6] Strong Yorkshire Ale. You can locate this Beer in 'merica, but usually only at the larger import liquor stores. Whenever I visit North Yorkshire, I try to get to the Black Sheep Baa..r & Bistro at least once during my stay to get some really fresh Beers, along with a pretty decent lunch.

http://www.blacksheepbrewery.com/

My favourite 'merican brewery would have to be Samuel Adams®, and my favourite progeny of theirs would have to be their Seasonal Brew Octoberfest. (Note: This style of Beer is actually called an Oktoberfest in German. It is a minor point, but spelling matters, 'kay?) "This authentic Märzen style, harkens back to the brews of Munich over 200 years ago. With 5 varieties of malt, it has a deep rich character & silky smoothness." "Hearty and smooth with a deep malt complexity and roasty sweetness." This brew truly matches or surpasses many of the Oktoberfest Beers that I had when living in Germany even. 

http://www.samueladams.com/beers/octoberfest/

Home brewing of Beer (as opposed to home brewing of coffee) has become very popular in the past twenty years. I have even had the opportunity to assist in the brewing of a few batches of Beers (drinking the output is much more fun, though). Another fellow 'blogger, Cabin Jim (by the way, he is the one to blame for me getting started with my own 'blog ~ you can direct any hate e-mails to him), has been trying his hand at this hobby lately. You can check out his bucolic 'blog here and look for the label "Home Brewing":

http://hawksbillcabin.blogspot.com/search/label/Home%20Brewing

And just in case you really would like some Beer for breakfast, there is always Well's & Young Banana Bread Beer:

http://www.wellsandyoungs.co.uk/home/our-beers/ales/wells-banana-bread-beer

Cheers! Ein prosit! Céad míle fáilte! *urp*


Glen Bacon Scale Rating:  Guinness® Extra Stout ~ 8.5 (consider this the Marilyn Monroe of Beers); Black Sheep Brewery Riggwelter ~ 8.2 (consider this the Nicole Kidman of Beers); Samuel Adams® Octoberfest ~ 8.1 (and this would be the Uma Thurman of Beers)


[1] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-fermentary pointer of the day, number one:

The word origin of "Beer" comes from Middle English "bere", from Old English "bēor"; related to Old Norse "bjorr", Old Frisian "biār", and Old High German "bior".

[2] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-fermentary pointer of the day, number two:

The word "Ale" comes from Old English "alu" and "ealu"; related to Old Norse "öl" and Old Saxon "alofat".

[3] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-fermentary pointer of the day, Nummer drei:

"Lager" comes from German "Lagerbier", meaning "beer for storing", from "Lager", meaning "storehouse".

[4] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-fermentary pointer of the day, Nummer vier:
 
"Pilsner" comes from German "Pilsener", meaning "of Pilsen", a town in Bohemia (the Czech name of the town is Plzen) where it was first brewed.

[5] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-fermentary pointer of the day, Nummer fünf:
 
"Märzen" comes from German "Märzenbier", meaning "March Beer"; according to a Bavarian brewing ordinance, a true "Märzen" can only be brewed between September 29th and April 23rd.

[6] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-fermentary pointer of the day, number six:
 
"Riggwelter" is Yorkie-dales-speak for a sheep that is on its back and cannot get up without help. This comes from Old Norse "rygg", meaning "back", and "velte", meaning "to overturn".

The Crepe House

I may be a Crêêp, but I ain't no Wêirdo!

http://www.thecrepehouse.com/

(Sure it's a Radiohead song originally, but I just like Chrissie Hynde better than Thom Yorke... it's so f*cking special this way.)


My breakfastary destination this morning was The Crepe[1] House (and like a lot of local crêperies, they spell "crêpe/crêpes" sans the little hat thingy ~ which, as I have pointed out before, is technically called an "e-circumflex", I just prefer "little hat thingy" better). The Crepe House is a mini-chain crêpe joint in San Francisco; they have three locations throughout the City: Nob Hill, Hayes Valley, and the Mission. I went to the one on Gough Street in Hayes Valley today; I have been here a few times in the past (as well as their Nob Hill spot), but this was my first visit back in a couple of years.

I found out today that they are closing/leasing this specific location. I am not sure if the entire chain is going out of business or just this one shop in Hayes Valley. There is a "FOR LEASE Restaurant" sign on the side of the building. Anyone want to start a new business venture with an existing location?

(June 26th, 2012 Update:
I was in Hayes Valley this afternoon for lunch and stopped by to see if they were still open. They were completely closed and looked like they had been for a few weeks now. They have a sign on the door stating that their other two locations ~ 1755 Polk Street/at Washington Street and 1132 Valencia Street/at 22nd Street ~ are still open for business.)

Tomorrow is the 101st running of San Francisco's very own elite and completely idiotic Bay-to-Beer! (officially known as Bay-to-Breakers, unofficially knows as Bay-to-Buffalo, and alternatively life-styled known as Gay-to-Breakers ~ see previous 'blog-entries from May 15th, 2011 and May 16th, 2010 for more information). I only mention this as it will pass by just a block away from this crêperie, up and over the infamous Hayes Street Hill.

Not only do they have a large and varied selection of savoury crêpes, but they also offer a decent selection of omelettes, Belgian waffles, Huevos Rancheros, and Eggs Benedict/Florentine (for breakfast); sandwiches, pastas, and salads (for lunch/dinner); and dessert crêpes (for anytime). Their ordering procedure is like most crêperies and coffee shops: you order at the counter, pay for the meal first, they give you a number to take back to your table, and then they bring the food out to you when it's done (which makes it very hard to "chêw-and-scrêw" at these places). I chose the Mediterranean ~ Cheddar cheese, onions, tomatoes, black olives, Feta, roasted red peppers, avocado, artichokes (hearts), & pesto sauce; served with rosemary potatoes and baby mixed greens; I also had a cuppa coffee with the meal (and it was pretty decent, just no freebie refills).

I liked it all well enough. It was chock full o' stuff. Pluses: there were lots of avocado, roasted red pepper strips, and most of the other ingredients in it. Minuses: the artichoke hearts were the marinated kind ~ I feel this would have been better with the brined style; and the black olives were just the standard sliced, canned variety ~ as always, this would have been so much better with real Kalamata olives. Now this was a decent enough crêpe (and I never even attempt to make pancakes, let alone crêpes); however, my main minor quibble here (une quibble mineure ici) was the amount (or lack thereof) of Feta inside; they were pretty stingy with this one ingredient, and it is one of my favourites.

The rosemary potatoes were excellent, Mr. Parsleysagethyme ~ nice and crispy/crunchy slices. I skipped the stupid "baby mixed greens", baby. I can make that myself ~ open up a bag of pre-washed, mixed lettuces/greens, put on plate… et violins! A fresh-made salad! Big deal.

The Crepe House only has condimentary supplementation of Tabasco®, two flavours: the standard red and green Jalapeño. So I used a little of my own Cherry Republic® KaBOB's Kick'en Hot Sauce (Thanks, Cindy!) on the potatoes and a little Big Papi En Fuego Hot Sauce ~ Original Medium (Thanks, Kerry! That now kills that bottle, too; the remaining two bottles of Off The Wall Triple Hot and Grand Slam XXXtra Hot! will last me a few years more, I am sure.) on the crêpe.

The Crepe House has an interesting collection of teapots over the counter and along the back wall. (Greg, don't worry, Cindy's collection outnumbers theirs by twofold at least.)

Glen Bacon Scale Rating:  Mediterranean Crêpe ~ 6.4[2]


[1] Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-epicurean pointer of the day, numéro un:
 
The French word "crêpe/crêpes" comes from Old French "crespe", which comes from Latin "crispa", the feminine of "crispus", meaning "curled, uneven, wrinkled".
 
As best as I can discern, this is the same word root used for the fabric made of silk, cotton, or other fiber. It is also the same word root for "crepe paper". (You can consider that an extra-added, at no charge, stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-haberdasherial pointer of the day.) 
 
However, the anglicized spelling of this word is just pure "crape".
 
[2] Now I am not being hypercritical (or hypocritical… or even Harpocritical) with my GBS Rating of today's meal. 6.4 is actually a very decent score.
 
Here is a quick GBS refresher:
 
6.5-7.0, worth a return trip ~ the equivalent in terms of females:  Marisa Tomei and Lindsay Lohan (back before she went crack-head, bat-shit crazy, of course);
7.1-7.5, definitely worth at least a few more return trips ~ think: Salma Hayek, Scarlett Johansson, and Natalie Portman;
7.6-8.5, please invite me along ~ think: Uma Thurman, Nicole Kidman, and Marilyn Monroe;
8.6-10.0, say "Hi!" to Saint Peter for me, 'cause you must be dead and in Heaven
 
It is all highly scientific, of course.

Dottie’s True blue café

New location, same ol' great food



(Still no official website. They are now relocated at 28 6th Street, just a half block off Market Street; phonicular info: 415-885-2767.)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOlpcJhNyDI

(Not really sure what kinda jam Edward Ellington was talking about, but Dottie's True blue café has an excellent Chipotle Pepper Jelly that they make themselves. The reason for this particular EweToob link is that Dottie's was playing some old live Duke radio programs on the house stereo.)


The big news this weekend (well, after the NFL Championship games) is that Dottie's True blue café (see last 'blog-entry from September 11th, 2011) has finally reopened at their new (technically) South of Market Street location (hence, I am writing about it; otherwise, I would have gone elsewhere for breakfast this morning). One nice thing about the new location, it was very easy to find a parking space (legal and somewhat safe) right on the corner of 6th and Market Streets. I had gotten there so early that I was actually the very first person to arrive in the morning and had to wait about ten minutes before they opened their doors/gates (7:30am everyday).

I am very impressed with the actual location/building (the neighborhood, not so much; it's basically a little of the same as the Tenderloin). It is in an old 1910 brick building (love the styling and architecture); it has a much larger seating capacity than before (probably 2-3 times larger); and there is a second floor outdoor patio (currently not open; hopefully by the Summer) that seats another 20 or more people. What this means for local diners (or breakfasters) and touristas alike is that there shouldn't really be that much need to have to wait outside on the sidewalk any more. Yeah, I know, the "free impromptu street performances" were sometimes a bit fun, but you can only hand out so much change to the indigenous populace. Dottie's now has a large enough anteroom (where you can get a cuppa while you wait, even) to stay warm and dry on the worst of days (like this morning, ferinstance).

Another major plus for the new place, they now have restrooms right on the premises. In the past, the restroom (singular, I believe) was next door, inside the lobby of a residence hotel. Not so sure this old tin sign advertisement was put in the right place, though (more than likely it was, and it was juxtaposed[1] for the humour aspect).





Dottie's no longer has the cool teapot and coffeepot chandeliers that they used to have; I suppose the older building kind of warranted keeping the older looking light fixtures that were already in place. Luckily, they still have some of their old snow globes collection on the front counter, as I had schlepped[2] a small one as a souvenir all the way from Wien ~ a Stephansdom (Saint Stephen’s Cathedral) winter scene. Dottie's did keep the tradition of all the kitschy salt-and-pepper shakers, too; and in keeping with the winter/holiday theme still, my pair today were a set of snowmen on a little red sleigh.





I was very excited to see that they had their most excellent Zucchini Cakes (topped with poached eggs and a spicy Marinara sauce ~ think Eggs Benedicto) on their weekend special board! This is not only one of Kurt's most inspired and tasty inventions, it is probably one of my favourite dishes at Dottie's, which would make it one of my favouritest breakfasts anywhere. Alas, it was not to be… I was informed that they were all out of them already this weekend. (See, this is how good they are ~ Dottie's had just reopened on Friday morning and they were already sold-out of this item!)

Luckily, there were several good fall-backs on the specials board (and their standard menu, too). So I went with the Frittata ~ avocado, tomato, corn, jalapeño, scallions, and Feta, served with toast and home fried potatoes. I also ordered a large glass of grapefruit juice and a cuppa ~ well, more like a cuppa and a halfa (or two), as they kept coming around with more refills (less refills would be useless).




The frittata was a very good choice (okay, it wasn't as good as the Zucchini Cakes would have been, but sometimes you just have to settle for the likes of Uma Thurman when Nicole Kidman is otherwise engaged); I was not disappointed in it whatsoever. It had lots of good stuff in it, tons of fresh avocado and corn (two favourites of mine). It was huge, too; I did finish it, but may not eat again all day (well, until the NFL games start).

Dottie's has one of the better condimentary supplements selections around: Tabasco® (standard red, Chipotle, and Jalapeño), Tapatío®, Frank's® RedHot Chile 'n Lime™, and a few others. However, I had brought a few of my own and used Sylvia's Restaurant® Kickin' Hot Hot Sauce (Thanks, Sean!) on the frittata (just a little for extra flavour, as there was already enough good stuff in it to suffice) and some Benito's Original Naranja (Thanks, Brian!) on the potatoes.

My one minor complaint about the new place is that the counter seats are now further away from the stoves/open cooking area and you really can't see Kurt working his magic at the grill; that was always half the fun, getting to see "the show".

Once again, as I stated in my very first review two years ago here:
"Anyone coming to San Francisco, or even those locals that might read this, do yourself a flavour and go to Dottie's for the real San Francisco Treat (Rice-A-Roni® be damned)."


Glen Bacon Scale Rating: Frittata ~ 7.2


[1] Stupid, useless etymological pointer of the day:

"Juxtapose" is not Red Neck-ese for "to have an idea", as in "Hey, Zeke, juxtapose you and I won the lottree; we'd be thousandeers!" It actually means "to place side by side, especially for comparison or contrast"; the verb is a back formation from the noun "juxtaposition", which comes from the Latin root "juxtā" (meaning "next to") and the French word "position" (meaning "look it up if you really need to").

[2] Stupid, useless cunning linguist pointer of the day:

"Schlep" is slang for "to carry, lug". It comes from the Yiddish "schlepn" (to pull, drag), which comes from the Middle High German dialect "schleppen"… yada, yada, yada.

Whenever I have a question regarding a Yiddish word, I break out my one true, trusty lexicon of Yinglish: "The Joys of Yiddish" by Leo Rosten. Mr. Rosten has this alternately spelled as "shlep", and I quote:

"Pronounced shlep, to rhyme with 'hep'… From the German: schleppen: 'to drag'.

1. To drag, pull, or lag behind. 'Don't shlep all those packages; let the store deliver them.' 'Pick up your feet; don't shlep.' 'They shlepped me all the way out to see their house.'"

Radish

comparethebreakfast.com? Simples…




http://www.radishsf.com/


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8s_KaiWoHg&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XM6rtnnpKOw&ob=av2e


A co-worker (Hi, Ron!) mentioned a new place that had recently opened (well, back in April, but I just got around to finally trying it) in his neighborhood (la Misión), Radish[1]. I had to ask my server "Why 'Radish'?", she explained that it was just a play on words: "rad" + "-ish" ~ "Simples!"… it's a bit of a hipster kind of place.

Radish is not a very large space: six 2-seat tables, three 4-seat tables, and ten seats at the counter/bar (with a very decent selection of Beers on tap, I am happy to point out; I didn't take any picture of their taps line-up, but I really should have ~ they offer @ 9-10 interesting Beers). Their "Morning Menu" (thank you for not calling it "Brunch") doesn't really have that many things from which to choose, but what they do offer all sound pretty decent.

I started with a glass of Strawberry-Lemonade. I expected this to just be a watered-down, tasteless drink with some added strawberry syrup or such. However, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that this was actually a homemade lemonade with freshly mulled strawberries in every glass (make those servers work for their tips). This was a very tasty way to start the meal.




For breakfast I ordered Migas[2] ~ A scramble of egg, onion, bell pepper, cheese, and tortilla strips. Served with avocado, pickled jalapeños, and corn tortillas. Choice of hash browns, fruit, or greens (if you have read any of my past 'blog-entries, you needn't ask which one I chose). This also came with a little bowl of fresh pico de gallo.




This was a simple enough dish, Sergei, and really just a variation of chilaquiles. The portions weren't very large; but after yesterday's dim sum extravaganza, I really wasn't that hungry still ~ and it was all more than enough for my appetite, anyhow. There was probably at least ½ an avocado on top, which is always a plus. Now, here is the major kudos part: the side of pickled jalapeños were freshly made and extremely tasty, too; I was fully expecting those vinegary, soggy, tasteless ones from a jar or can (which are fine for using in salsas or burritos, but not that great as a topping by themselves).

Radish has as condimentary supplementation Tabasco® (just the standard red) and Cholula®. I had come equipped with two favourites from my own collection: Palo Alto Fire Fighters Pepper Sauce (Thanks, Amys![3]) and Benito's Original Naranja; I used some of the PAFFPS on the migas and some Benito's on the potatoes (hash brown or home fried, they were very good, too).

Everything worked very well together on the migas (pico de gallo, pickled jalapeños, and of course my own condimentary supplementation) to make this a very nice breakfast. I would go back for this itself, and that the Strawberry-Lemonade was so good makes this a good choice for a return trip… one of these days.


Glen Bacon Scale Rating: Migas ~ 6.66; Strawberry-Lemonade ~ 6.66


[1] Here's a little know fact, Cliff:

The radish is a member of the Cabbage/Mustards family, Colonel (just like it's evil cousin "the vile weed".)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radish_%28band%29

And just in case you thought you could get away without a stupid, useless cunning linguist pointer of the day, numerus:

"Radish" comes from the Old English "rǣdic" from the Latin "rādīx" meaning "root".

[2] Stupid, cunning linguist pointer of the day, el número dos:

"Las migas" in Spanish actually means "crumbs".

Traditionally in Spain and Portugal migas are a breakfast dish made from day-old bread (hence the "crumbs", Robert). Somehow, this dish in Tex-Mex cuisine has come to be made with scrambled eggs, very similar to chilaquiles, but using tortilla strips instead of tortilla quarters.

[3] This was not a typo (actually I am a Type O Positive), this was meant to be "Amys" as in two ladies named "Amy". My friend Amy (the Hallowe'en Queen from yesterday's 'blog-entry) has a friend also named Amy. The second Amy had extra bottles of this stuff that she had recently purchased at a local street festival. My friend Amy knowing that I love this stuff and had recently run out, secured (as in purloined) me a bottle from the other Amy.

If I only knew it was that easy to get stuff by asking…

"Hey, Amys, I really like Nicole Kidman and Uma Thurman… and have just recently run out of both."

http://www.paloaltofirefighters.com/

Seriously, any local that really likes their hot sauce con mucho sabor, locate this stuff; you will not be disappointed.

Dottie’s TRUE BLUE CAFE

The Marilyn Monroe of Breakfast Joints




I had to start my first breakfast 'blog with this perennial favourite of mine. In my opinion (and, of course, my opinion is all that really matters here ~ my 'blog, my rules), this is by far the best Breakfast place in San Francisco for your money. I have been going there for close to twenty years now (early 90's at least), and go there about 6-10 times a year (do the math ~ I have eaten there a lot). Anyone coming to visit from out of town is usually "forced" to join me there for breakfast (after which, they join the legion of satisfied customers who will now pass along to anyone visiting San Francisco about this great place).

Dottie's TRUE BLUE CAFE is located on Jones Street, between Geary and O'Farrell Streets. It is right on the border of the Theatre/Hotel District and the Tenderloin, so that is always an interesting location ~ no charge for the "street performances" while you are waiting in line outside. It is owned and run by Kurt Abney ~ chief cook ~ but I am pretty sure someone else washes the bottles. Watching him work the grille is a work of art.



Dottie's is a kinda small place. It only has ten tables (averaging 2-4 seats per table) and five counter seats. So the total amount of people that can enter and be served at one time is less than forty normally. The clientele are generally lined up outside the door a half-block long (rain or shine ~ usually rain) and the wait can be anywhere from a ½-hour to one hour, depending on the time of day. Be patient; it is well worth the wait. They are only open for Breakfast and Lunch, seven days a week, and are usually busy all day long.


 










 
I had the frittata from their specials board: Avocado, tomato, corn, scallions, jalapeño, and Feta. It comes with a heaping mound of home fries (superb) and a side of corn bread toast. As always, the combination of the fresh ingredients and sides were excellent. To me, it just ain't breakfast unless there are good 'tater dishes involved somehow (and lots o' black coffee).

All of their breads and pastries are fresh baked daily. Unfortunately for me, whenever I go alone, I can never eat that much food so have only tried their baked goods a few times. Their selection is excellent and always interesting, though. Today's line-up included: Black Plum Whiskey Crumb Cake, Coconut Honey Muffin, White Chocolate Blueberry Coffee Cake, Pear Toffee Cream Bar, Sweet Potato Honey Nut Bread, Pumpkin Cranberry Bread, and several other original ones.

Unlike most restaurants, they offer a great selection of hot sauces on the tables and counter from which to choose: three or four varieties of Tabasco® Sauce (Regular, Jalapeño, Chipotle, and Habañero), plus a few other brands (which is nice so that I do not have to schlep my own bottles from home with me as I normally would). Their salt and pepper shaker collection is always fun as most people do not even know what they are until they ask for some salt and pepper ~ mine today looked like standard sized avocados.

The beauty of this place is how people from all over the World come here when they are in San Francisco (the location near many hotels is a plus). At the counter with me were a lady from Hampshire, England (very cute, I must say), a man from Frankfurt, Deutschland, and a couple from Austin, Texas. Sitting at the counter is always a plus as you get to see "the show" of the meal being prepared (and you can make sure that Kurt doesn't spit in your food). Every time that I have gotten there when the restaurant opens (and I assume it is probably every day of the year, too), there is an elderly gentleman named Mr. Skinner seated at the counter that has a daily bowl of oatmeal ~ more than likely comped by the guy working the grille (I hope his boss doesn't find out).

Anyone coming to San Francisco, or even those locals that might read this, do yourself a flavour and go to Dottie's for the real San Francisco breakfast treat (Rice-A-Roni® be damned).

Rating on the Glen Bacon Scale*: 8.5




*(The Glen Bacon Scale was developed in the 70's as a highly scientific way to rate the female species. Unlike the normal 1-10 rating, this is a logarithmic scale, similar to the Richter Scale, which is a much more precise way of determining the tastitude of a female and I have appropriated it here for the use in determining a restaurant's worthiness. Simply speaking: anything under 5.0 is inedible ~ think most fast food places ~ everything over 5.0 is worth checking out. You will never eat a "10" meal ~ if you do, say "Hi!" to God for me, 'cause you are dead and have gone to heaven. In terms of women: Uma Thurman is an 8.0, Nicole Kidman is an 8.2, Marilyn Monroe was an 8.5, etc., you get the idea.)