M’s Cafe

(No official web-site.)

1376 9th Avenue (Between Irving and Judah Streets)

phonicular contact: (415) 665-1821

(It was either going to be this 1980's New Wave relic EweToob link or one from Eminem, but I am not a big fan of the real Slim Shady or even the fake Marshall Mathers, Mrs. Cleaver.

In case you were wondering, Martha and the Muffins were also known as "M + M" for a while. I'd like to see what Alfred Einstein[1] would make of that equation.)


Sometimes a low-falutin' breakfast is just what is called for, especially after my trip to the upscale Munchkinland Café last Sunday. M's Cafe (I am not sure if this is avec ou sans accent aigu, as there wasn't one on their printed menu or on their awning and signs), over in the Inner Sunset, was the real deal (and it was neither "slim", nor "shady" I was very happy to see). M's Cafe is a small "Mom" & "Pop" restaurant, with seating for just 36. "Mom" does the order taking and serving, and "Pop" does all the cooking. They open up at 7:00am, six days a week (they are closed on Tuesdays). Their early morning menu is simply called "Breakfast" as it correctly should be.

It's not really that hard to park in this neighborhood early on a Saturday morning, but I played it safe and parked two blocks away in Golden Gate Park, just across the street from the San Francisco Botanical Garden (formerly Strybing Arboretum[2]). There is usually lots of free 4-Hour parking available if you get there before all the damn touristas do in the morning.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strybing_Arboretum

Pocket-Sized Urban(e) Rant of the Day (cont.):

Okay, I can see snooty, upscale locations like North Beach and (s)Nob Hill falling prey to these stupid little jokes of "parklets". However, the Inner Sunset is a relatively nice neighborhoody neighborhood; it really hasn't been infected/infested by the gentrification virus. I was very surprised to see one of these just down the street from where I was eating. At least this stupid one only wastes two parking spots along 9th Avenue. You really can't expect someone to have to walk two whole blocks all the way to Golden Gate Park to enjoy some outdoor greenery, now can you?!

M's Cafe has a pretty decent/standard breakfastary menu from which to choose. There are also a few interesting specials on their menu. I was thinking of getting the Meatless Eggs Benedict ~ sautéed onions, tomatoes, mushrooms, spinach, and two poached eggs. They even offer an Irish Breakfast (gachhh!) ~ Two eggs, two slices of Irish bacon, two links of Irish Sausages, two pieces of Black and White pudding (double-gachhh!), served with home fried potatoes and two slices of toast (and, contrary to popular belief, a real Irish Breakfast does not consist of a six pack o' Guinness® and a boiled potato). I ended up ordering the Spinach, Cheese, and Tomato Omelette ~ served with home fried potatoes or fruit, and two slices of toast. I also had a cuppa coffee and a large glass of orange juice.

"Pop" messed up and made my omelette a Spinach, Cheese, and Mushroom Omelette by mistake. "Mom" was going to take it back and have him re-do it, but it was no big deal, and I ended up keeping it as I am not averse to the fungal little beasts. Besides, I was actually thinking of getting that omelette until I saw the other choice; I just think that spinach and tomato is a better combo than spinach and mushroom. This was a good enough omelette with lots of spinach and tomatoes… er, mushrooms in it. Of course I went with the home fried potatoes as my side choice (I can make a damn fruit salad myself at home… if I ever had any fresh fruit around) and sourdough as my choice of toast. These were really good home fries; crispy in spots and creamy/potatoey in others. The coffee was black and hot ~ typical diner fare. I really wasn't expecting anything else; if I had wanted to get a decent cuppa, I could have always gone to one of the nearby coffeehouses (of which there are several within a two-block area).

For condimentary supplementation M's Cafe has Tabasco® Brand Pepper Sauce, Crystal® Hot Sauce, and a Sriracha-style hot sauce. I ended up using some of my own Palo Alto Fire Fighters Pepper Sauce (Thanks agains, Amys and me!) on the potatoes; and some Cholula® Hot Sauce (Thanks, Brian!) on the omelette.

If you are wondering "Who is 'M'?", so am I. I forgot to ask and may never know now…


Glen Bacon Scale Rating:  Spinach, Cheese, and Tomato… er, Mushroom Omelette ~ 5.9


1. Alfred Einstein was Albert's lesser known and not quite as smart younger brother. Alfred was the one that formulated in the late 1980's the Theory of Relative Stupidity, "E = mc Hammer".

2. Stupid, useless cunning linguist/pseudo-horticultural pointer of the day:

"Arboretum" comes from Latin "arborētum", meaning a plantation of trees, equivalent to "arbor" (tree) + "ētum" (suffix denoting a place where a given plant grows).

Other related 'merican/English words: "arbor/arbour", "arboreal/arboureal", "arboresque/arbouresque", and "... 'at's no sea lion, 'at's an 'arbour seal, 'enry".