"Friends don't let friends eat pommes mit mayo..."
(You try finding a good EweToob link about any kind of condimentary supplementation.)
The idea for this entire 'blog-entry started when I saw a picture of the Berlin Airlift Monument (nicknamed "die Gabel" or "die Hunger-Harke", meaning "the Fork" or "the Hunger-Rake") posted on defacedbook by a fellow Russkij cunning linguist (and also a former member of 6912th ESS, Marienfelde site). (Hallo, Herr Estes! Здравствуйте, Господин Эстес!)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platz_der_Luftbr%C3%BCcke
The reason for the nickname is that the monument resembles the little disposable forks (or vice-versa; "Was kam zuerst, das Huhn oder das Ei?") used to eat French fries, and it got me to reminiscing about eating these potato delicacies late at night at the local street vendors known as an "Imbiss"[1]. There were two choices of condimentary supplementation offered with "pommes frites"[2] (pronounced "pumm fritz") or simply "pommes (pronounced "pummas"): the completely acceptable and palatable German-style curry-ketchup[3] or plain ol' disgusting mayonnaise[4] from a jar (or, even worse, from a tube ~ don't ask).
German curry-ketchup is just plain tomato ketchup with some (red) curry powder added for flavour and a bit of piquantness.
Whereas, mayonnaise (as perfectly described earlier today by someone else when I mentioned it) is an "epicurean disaster". Even the word when pronounced in German is disgusting; it is pronounced as "my-oh-nahz-a" which sounds similar to "my own ass-a"; which is about what it tastes like if you ask me. I understand that some people feel it necessary to use this vile white goop (or vile white globule, or vile white garbage, or vile white gross-out ~ either way, it will henceforth be called "vwg" in this 'blog-entry) in potato salads, macaroni salads, and egg salads for moisture; however, plain yoghurt might be a better (and healthier) alternative. (Of course, I wouldn't really know this for a fact, as I have never really made potato salad from scratch… or from potatoes even.) And there should never be any reason for anyone to ever put the vwg on my veggie-burgers (especially without asking first); I am okay with Thousand Island, Ranch, or other less vile toppings, though.
Maybe if you were drunk enough this awful idea may have seemed like a good choice at the time… but I would have to be passed-out with a 0.50 BAC to ever try it voluntarily again.
Apparently French fries with the vwg is a normal condimentary supplement in France and Belgium, too. Now a fresh-made aioli is something different entirely and I have even enjoyed this many times at a Belgian-style French fries place, Frjtz (see 'blog-entry from November 19th, 2011), but they offer many different flavours of aioli and several ketchups, too. Eating French fries with the vwg is as bad as putting ketchup on a hotdog, Clinton:
Just remember that the Germans are mainly known for their excellent Beers, fine pastries, and Blitzkriegs; the French know the world of haute cuisine, wines, and cheeses but their street foods are not really that great; and the Belgians need to stick with their Ales, waffles, and sprouts, Jean Claude!
Conclusion: τζατζίκι (Tzatziki) is the best condimentary supplementation with French-fried or any other style of potatoes.
Glen Bacon Scale Rating: Curry-ketchup ~ 6.0; vwg ~ 4.5; Tzatziki ~ 8.5
[1] Stupid, useless cunning linguist pointer of the day, nummer eins:
"Imbiss" simply means "snack" in German. An Imbiss was usually a little van or shack along the side of the street where they served fast food items, and was usually open 24-hours a day.
[2] Stupid, useless cunning linguist pointer of the day, nummer zwei/numéro deux:
"Pommes frites"/"pommes" are borrowed words in German from French. "Pommes (de terre) frites" in French means "fried potatoes". The word for "potato" in French is "pomme de terre", meaning "earth apple".
[3] Stupid, useless cunning linguist pointer of the day, number three (I have used this one before):
"Ketchup" comes from Malay "kichap", from Chinese (Amoy dialect) "koechiap", meaning "brine of fish." Catsup (earlier catchup) is a failed attempt at Anglicization, still in use in the U.S. Originally a fish sauce, early English recipes included among their ingredients mushrooms, walnuts, cucumbers, and oysters. Modern form of the sauce began to emerge when U.S. seamen added tomatoes.
[4] Stupid, useless cunning linguist pointer of the day, numéro quatre:
"Mayonnaise" comes from French, perhaps from "Mahonnais", meaning "of Mahón", a port in the island of Minorca, Spain.
Sometimes I like to eat pommes with the little forks, and yes - with mayo.
ReplyDelete