Saturday, April 15, 2017

Squat & Gobble Cafe & Crepery

Place: Squat & Gobble Cafe & Crepery

Location: 1 West Portal Avenue 
(on the corner of Ulloa Street)

Hours: open seven days a week at 8:00am

Meal: Tropical Island (Sweet Crepe) ~ fresh pineapple, papaya[1], banana, shredded 
coconuts [ sic ], brown sugar (at least not "brown sugars"), caramel sauce, candied walnuts, topped with pineapple papaya sauce, served with your choice of vanilla bean Ice Cream or whipped cream; (then for dessert) a side of Our (well, Their) "Famous" Rosemary Garlic Potatoes (just not "Rosemary Garlic Potato"); and a large glassa fresh-squeezed (well, fresh-machined) oranges juice

Their awful name aside, I went back to 
Squat & Gobble Cafe & Crepery (see last 'blog-entry from Saturday, February 27th, 2016) for breakfast again this morning. I sat downstairs in the main dining area (I am not exactly sure when they even open up the balcony seating area upstairs) because it was still pretty early and there were lots of open tables.

I have eaten at Squat & Gobble Cafe & Crepery so many times already that I probably have had just about all of their Savory Crepes (well, those suitable for stupid vegetarians). Some of the other ideas that I was thinking about today: Mama Mia (a Savory Crepe; Mozzarella, Parmesan & cottage cheese, onions, mushrooms, spinach, eggplant & tomatoes, topped with Marinara sauce; I have had this [at least once] before and really like it); Whole Thing (another Sweet/Dessert Crepe; fresh bananas, candied walnuts, brown sugar & cinnamon, topped with nutella® & powdered sugar); Castro (Omelette; Feta cheese, tomatoes, spinach & Kalamata olives; oh, yeah ~ this was going to be my choice if I hadn't gone sweet this morning); South of the Border (Omelette; pepper Jack cheese, black bean chili & avocado, topped with salsa, jalapeño, sour cream & cilantro); Fillmore (Omelette; sautéed bell peppers, mushrooms, tomatoes, ham & melted Cheddar cheese; which I would have ordered without the porky-bits); or Milan (Scrambler; Italian sausage, spinach, mushrooms, onions, tomatoes & Parmesan cheese, topped with pesto sauce; of course, I would have also ottantasei-ed il culatello di maiale morto in decomposizione).

As I had expected, this was a very good (and definitely sweet) crêpe (or crepe). I was surprised that there was a bit more papaya in it than both the pineapple and banana combined, though. As strange as it may sound, I actually opted for the whipped cream option instead of the Ice Cream one; this was breakfast, after all, and I wanted to maintain a semblance of breakfastary decorum.

Squat & Gobble Cafe & Crepery has both Tabasco® Brand Pepper Sauce (Original Red Sauce) and Cholula® Hot Sauce (Original) for condimentary supplementation. I used a little of my own Palo Alto Firefighters Pepper Sauce 
XXX Ghost (Thanks, Brian!) on one half of the potatoes and some Dixie Crossroads Hot Habañero [ sic ] Pepper Sauce (Thanks, Brian! [Who happens to be no relation to the first Brian thanked previously.]) on the other half of the potatoes. Additionally, I broke out a brand new pepper-grinder/shaker from Morton® (Yes, the salt-people... "When it rains... it grinds?!"), which I had purchased just last week. I tested it out all over the potatoes... and stopped short of trying some on top of the crêpe (or crepe), too. (Don't judge me! It would probably have worked nicely. There used to be a local Berlin [well, "local" if you lived in the Kreuzberg or Tempelhof neighborhoods] restaurant that served fresh cracked black peppercorns on top of vaniller Ice Cream [itself on top of a warm fresh fig] and it was delicious.)

the Wild Parrots of San Francisco Interlude

After breakfast, while walking along West Portal, I saw (well, I heard them squawking loudly first) a medium-to-large pandemonium (probably twenty to thirty or so) of the Wild Parrots flying overhead. I was somewhat confused as to why they were in this southern part of the city, then I remembered that they have a good-sized roost nearby in the trees at the top of Rocky Outcrop Park or Golden Gate Heights Park (which are just over the [Forest] Hill from the West Portal neighborhood).

I had purposely skipped any Coffee with breakfast as I figured I would head to the other end of West Portal to get a decent cuppa at Greenhouse Cafe once again. I got a medium cuppa (whatever the [Green]house roast/blend may have been today) Naked Coffee. It was still a bit too cold to sit outside in their garden patio area this morning, so I ended up drinking it inside for a change (or for the warmth).

Glen Bacon Scale Rating:
Tropical Island (Sweet Crepe) ~ 6.7;
the Wild Parrots of San Francisco ~ 8.5


1. Stupid, useless pseudo-botanical and pseudo-geographical note:

a) The papaya fruit (like the banana fruit) is a berry, botanically speaking.
b) The papaya plant is native to the tropics of the Americas, perhaps from southern Mexico and neighboring Central America. It was first cultivated in Mexico several centuries before the emergence of the Mesoamerican classical civilizations. So, having this ingredient in a crêpe (or crepe) named "Tropical Island" is a bit misleading*... unless the island you are speaking of happened to be named Cozumel or Isla del Tiburón.

*(Sub-note: The pineapple plant is indigenous to South America and is said to originate from the area between southern Brazil and Paraguay. The Spanish introduced it into the Philippines, Hawai'i, Zimbabwe, and Guam.)

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